Trust in Christ, not in People

G. K. Chesterton once wrote:

“I believe in Liberalism. But there was a rosy time of innocence when I believed in Liberals.” - “Orthodoxy”, p. 46.

One of the consequences of having a life not surrendered to Christ, which must include all of our lives at some level, is the inevitability of letting one another down. We will hurt each other and have conflict from time to time. This is a fact of our faith and life, which is not always appreciated. We either look too fondly on others, and not upon Christ as the paramount certainty, or we look too poorly on others and expect nothing much from them, which is a way of boxing them in, and somehow, limiting what Christ might be able to do in them (eventually!).

Often, I hear young Christians in the process of planting a new Church, for instance, speaking passionately about having “real” community. Surely this is a laudable goal. However, I am not sure that what they are really talking about is altogether too idealistic or is a real conception of community.

Community can exist at several levels, not always deep ones, and yet be truly meaningful to people at an unexpected (and overlooked) variety of levels. There is a limited amount of depth than one can experience in all relationships, and very few are particularly intimate, though all can be enriching (sometimes not!). Which makes me wonder whether, particularly in such a fragmented society, that there is really something else going on with this desire for authentic community.

I would not be surprised if the root of this hunger for community might not be found in the fact that people may be yearning to make up the deficit that they have from their own broken families. We then project this longing onto the Church, and pretty soon, we become rather enmeshing in relationships in a way that may actually work against our goal in the first place. After all, which of us really knows what a real community is from actual experience? We are wise to protect, affirm and contribute to the sense and form of community that surrounds us - it being a major source of life and grounding for our lives that scripture mentions in many places. Furthermore, this worthy desire for true community is something that cults take advantage of. They commonly try to ape and ensnare their victims with some kind of surrogate family. I like the notion that God builds with bananas – with people like us – even with our bruises, bends, and bad habits!

Too often we measure the love we have for others by the depth of feeling we have or something, which is notoriously difficult to categorize, and such an attempt can spoil the beauty of this connections with others. We need a realistic notion of community to aim for that is nevertheless, not just wishful thinking, but able to weather the storms together; and to keep respect for differences and levels of commitment which cannot be forced or coerced. We have to maintain a real regard for the fact that we are broken people, and will all be in process (on the way to maturity) for a while. I also think we need to define what we do not mean when use the word community.

Jesus has no illusions about what we are like, and yet, was able to accomplish His mission in a marvelous way, rubbing shoulders with, and serving all kinds of people. John 2:25; “(Jesus) Knew what was in man”. Yet, even He faced great disappointment in those He trusted the most. This is a salutary lesson for all of us. It should not cause us to shrink back with fear, but remind us to keep a level head, and put our hope in Christ above all other things and people, without ignoring or skulking about without truly engaging with people either – this is a particular challenge after having been bitten a few times!

We are told that our relationships are a sign of love to the world (Jn 13:35;), that love is the first fruit of the Spirit (Gal 5:22;), and the test of our faith (1 Jn 3:17;). However, I do think we can go overboard in our ideas of community. We need to be both, available to others and God, and yet, able to separate ourselves from being too close to others (e.g., sometimes emotions can get in the way), that is always congruent with our faith. Nevertheless, we will be deeply hurt at times, as I know from some painful experiences, if we trust too much of ourselves to others, other than to love and be loved (in deed and attitude, as appropriate) – which is the business of a lifetime in the faith.

This posture of availability, and yet, measured reserve can be hard to define, but ultimately, God will be the judge. We might call it balance or having boundaries; but whatever terms we use, it is important to aim for a healthy combination of these things in our lives. I think disciplines such as solitude, journaling, and reflection, combined with the counsel of a wise shepherd will help us to attain or approach this much better.

Jesus said a very challenging thing – “that we are to love our enemies”. We do not even have to be friends with people to love and serve them. I sometimes have a hard time loving the people I am close too! Let’s not chase some communal paradise that can never appear on this earth, but let’s aim to build up one-another; giving space and mercy to each another. “He that believes in Him will not be disappointed.” Rom 9:33. If you believe in man, you will not be so fortunate.